Not-So-Silent Night (A Santa's Coming Short Story)

  Not So Silent Night

  Kelli Callahan

  Copyright © 2018 by Kelli Callahan

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  Created with Vellum

  Contents

  1. Livia

  2. Dillon

  3. Livia

  4. Dillon

  5. Livia

  6. Dillon

  7. Livia

  8. Dillon

  9. Livia

  Epilogue

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  Small Town Seven: Sneak Peek

  About the Author

  Livia

  “There you are.” My co-worker, Val, scurried over to me as soon as I stepped into the restaurant. “I was afraid you weren’t going to make it.”

  “Sorry.” I started removing my coat. “I got held up at work. After you left, things went to hell.”

  “That figures. We’re about to get started, but we have time to grab a drink.” Val took my arm and led me towards the bar.

  “I don’t know about this.” I looked over at her as we walked. “I’ve never done speed dating before.”

  “Trust me. It’s the best thing ever.” She grinned and motioned to the bartender as we approached. “Two of your special eggnogs, please.”

  “Coming right up.” The bartender nodded and turned towards the mini-fridge behind the bar.

  “Those are the guys.” Val pointed to a group of men that were gathered in one of the banquet rooms.

  “Not bad.” I tilted my head as I took a quick look. “A few of them are pretty attractive at least.”

  “Attractive? Girl, some of those guys are smoking hot.” She raised her eyebrows and nodded quickly. “Hot enough to melt your panties off your hips before the night is over.”

  “I wouldn’t go that far…” I chuckled under my breath and reached for my eggnog when the bartender put it down in front of me.

  “Don’t tell me that you’ve never had a one-night stand before.” Val cocked her head to the side.

  “That’s—not my thing.” I wrinkled my nose and shook my head.

  “You need to live a little. Don’t be so uptight.” Val giggled and nudged me. “Okay, it’s time to start. Come on.”

  Great. Let’s get it over with.

  Val had been trying to convince me to go speed dating with her for a couple of months, and in a moment of weakness, I agreed. I already regretted that decision. My moment of weakness came when the Christmas tree went up at the office, and I started thinking about spending another holiday season alone. I should have been used to it by that point, but there was a part of me that still wanted all of the things happy couples had. I just knew, deep down, that I would never have it. Fate dealt me a cruel hand of cards, and I was never going to experience true passion. My best-case scenario was a broken heart that could eventually heal—I didn’t dare to hope for anything more than that. I had been through it before, and after having every relationship fizzle out before I turned twenty-five, I wasn’t eager to dive headfirst into another one. My heart couldn’t stand to see that kind of disappointment in another man’s eyes—especially one that I cared about.

  “Here’s your table.” Val walked over and pointed. “It looks like I’m right beside you.”

  “Will they keep bringing us eggnog?” I sipped my drink. “This is really good.”

  And full of alcohol—which is precisely what I’m going to need to get through this night.

  “Yep, just flag down one of the waiters.” She grinned and took her seat.

  I finished the drink in my hand and got another one before the doors opened and the guys started filing into the room. Yes, some of them were cute. Some of them were hot. Some of them would have probably been guys I would have talked to when I was younger—before I found out that I was never going to have the happily-ever-after, I saw in all the movies I thought could become real life. Every girl dreams of that, right? Prince Charming on his white pony when they’re young—Jax Teller on his black motorcycle when they’re old enough to know the difference between the two. I had those dreams—those fantasies—but they were never more than images in my head. The reality was harsh, tragic even, just like the man approaching my table with silver colored hair budding along the edge of his hairline. He was pretty damn attractive, and while I didn’t usually go for older men, he still had enough of his youth for me not to care much—if I was as available as the rest of the women sitting at the tables around me.

  “Hey there, I’m Hank.” He extended his hand.

  “Livia.” I nodded and let him give my hand a quick peck before he sat down.

  Attractive and charming with a slight dose of chivalry. I remember when that was enough to make my heart flutter.

  I had four minutes with Hank, and he let me know that it was okay if I called him Daddy before he left the table. Tempting—but not really my thing. I would have marked him as a maybe when I was still not sure what kind of guy I liked. Once Hank left, a guy that was a few years younger took his spot. He told me all about his children—all three of them. That barely fit into four minutes. I didn’t have anything against a single dad, but he didn’t seem to have much room in his life for a girlfriend—probably why he was speed dating instead of trying to find time for a real date. The faces blurred as the first hour went by, and I was ready for another eggnog when intermission came. Truthfully, I was prepared to skip the extra ingredients and just start chugging bourbon, but I didn’t want to wake up with a hangover. I made my way back to the bar, and a few seconds later, Val was at my side.

  “Oh my god, this is the best group of guys ever!” Val was giggling when she sat down. “Usually every other guy is a hard no…”

  “Really? You consider this a good selection?” I raised an eyebrow and sipped my eggnog.

  “You met Hank, right? He could make me swoon.” Val fanned herself and grinned.

  “Are you going to call him Daddy?” I lifted my eggnog back to my lips.

  “Maybe—if he were my Daddy, I’d want to be a naughty girl.” Her grin turned into another giggle. “Especially if he that made him give me a spanking.”

  “Wow!” I rolled my eyes sarcastically. “Sounds like true love.”

  “I’m sure everyone is marking that sexy Daddy down as a yes.” She sighed. “I probably won’t even get a shot at him.”

  “I marked him as a maybe, so you won’t be competing against me if he’s the man of your dreams.” I motioned towards my card.

  “Wait...” Val grabbed my card. “You marked every guy as a no or maybe?”

  “None of them were particularly interesting.” I shrugged, downed the last of my eggnog, and immediately asked for another one.

  “You might be absolutely hopeless.” She sighed and shook her head. “Okay, it looks like they’re getting started again.”

  Great, time for four more minutes of hell—that keeps repeating itself when the buzzer goes off.

  The next guy that sat down across from me was a cocky former high school quarterback named Justin. He was easily thirty-five and still talked about those glory days like he had just won the big game. He was also drunker than I was, which wasn’t a good sign. I quickly marked him as a no when the buzzer sounded. The next guy was a moderately successful guy who worked at an investment firm. He was speed dating because he never got time away from the office and hinted that he wo
rked as hard as Christian Grey—whether he was at the office or not. He looked the part, except the way he said it made me think he might have some rope in the trunk of his car instead of his Red Room. I marked him as a no before he even left the table. A couple of more guys followed, and I was looking forward to the next break already, but there were a few more to go through before that happened. I got a refill on my eggnog and looked up as the next guy sat down.

  “Hi, I’m Dillon.” He sat down and shoved his hands into his pocket.

  “I’m Livia.” I pointed to my name tag. “Just like it says here.”

  “Cool.” He nodded and looked at his half-finished eggnog. “I should get another drink.”

  He looks less enthused to be here than I do, but we’ve got four minutes. I don’t want to spend them in silence.

  “So, what do you do?” I tilted my head to the side.

  “I’m a firefighter.” He smiled, but the edge of his lips barely moved, and it looked like he was forcing it.

  “That must be exciting.” I tilted my head in the opposite direction.

  “Yeah.” He nodded quickly and ordered another eggnog.

  Dillon was smoking hot and appeared to be a couple of years older than me at most. He was dressed in a white button-down shirt that hung loosely at his waist instead of being tucked in like most of the other guys in the room. I could see clearly defined muscles along his chest, broad shoulders, and biceps that threatened to pop the threads on his sleeve when he lifted his drink to his lips—rough, gorgeous looking lips. He had thick black hair, a jawline that looked like it could cut through glass, and smoldering onyx eyes—but while he was the perfect package on the outside, he didn’t seem to have any interest in using it to secure a date—with me at least. If I had come to the speed dating event looking for someone, he would have checked every yes box possible. At least he wasn’t interested. That would make it easier to check no and move on.

  “Do you have any kids?” I lifted my eggnog to my lips.

  “Nah.” He shook his head back and forth.

  “Me either.” I nodded slowly.

  Okay, come on clock—tick faster.

  “You don’t seem very excited to be here.” I folded my arms across my chest and leaned back.

  “Nope.” He lifted his head and looked at me. “Neither do you.”

  “Is it that obvious?” I chuckled slightly. “My friend made me come.”

  “Same here.” He motioned to the guy at the table across from Val. “That asshole over there.”

  “Ah, he’s talking to Val. She’s the one who dragged me here.” I chuckled again.

  The buzzer sounded, and I went back to the bar where Val was waiting. She was gushing about Dillon’s friend, Jonah. He was a firefighter too, and she wanted to change every other guy to no after meeting him. It was true love—too bad nothing was that easy. I started to feel pretty drunk when I got my eggnog refilled. It was watered down, but I had lost count by that point, so it was a good thing I took an Uber to the event. At least it would be easier to deal with the next carousel of guys if I was drunk. Luckily, there wasn’t enough alcohol in the world to sway my opinion about what would happen if I agreed to a date. Val started looking over my card as I sipped my eggnog. I hadn’t marked a single guy as a maybe during the second round, while her card seemed to be filling up with prospects. At least she would have the next few months of dating taken care of if they felt the same way when the event was over. I just wanted to go home and sleep off the eggnog.

  “I don’t get it, Livia.” Val tossed my card on the table. “You ignore the guys at the office when they flirt with you. You have a room full of guys that could potentially take you on a date—and you won’t give any of them a chance.”

  “It’s complicated.” I shrugged and sighed. “I didn’t want to come, to begin with, remember?”

  “I know, but I thought you would have a good time once you were out of the office.” She leaned closer. “What’s wrong? Did some guy break your heart?”

  “Something like that.” I nodded quickly and felt my eyes flutter.

  Okay, I’m a lot drunker than I realized. This stuff is hitting me all at once.

  “Tell me what’s wrong.” She leaned even closer. “What do you like? Maybe I can help you choose the right guy.”

  “It’s not about choosing the right guy.” I shifted on the stool so that she was invading less of my personal space.

  “What is it then? Are you a virgin or something?” She didn’t take the hint and decided she needed to close the space between us again.

  “No.” I chuckled under my breath.

  “Are you—into girls?” She tilted her head slightly.

  “I wouldn’t keep moving away from you every time you got closer if I was…” I slid to the edge of the stool.

  “Sorry.” She moved back a few inches. “I just want you to have fun—I want to know what’s wrong.”

  Ugh, fine. Maybe she’ll leave me alone if I just tell her.

  “I—um…” Even while drunk, it was hard to say the words. “I’ve never had an orgasm—because I can’t.”

  “You—what?” She blinked in surprise, and her head snapped back so fast that it looked like I had just slapped her. “You’re kidding!”

  “No.” I shook my head back and forth. “And no guy wants to be with a girl that makes him feel like he’s the worst fuck ever.”

  It was time to start the next round, so I hopped off the barstool and started walking back towards my table. That was it—that was the big secret. I couldn’t come. My high school boyfriend was the first guy that failed, but I thought it was just inexperience on both of our parts. When I got to college, I started dating a nice guy who did his damnedest to prove he was giving it more than the old college try, but nothing he did resulted in a climax. He was so nice, and I thought I loved him at the time, but our sex life—or lack thereof—destroyed the relationship.

  I still didn’t realize it was just me until I moved to the city, got a job, and started dating someone else. When we were finally intimate, the same problems arose. No matter how much he tried, it just didn’t take me all the way to the promised land. Don’t get me wrong, sex felt good—and I wanted to fake it a few times, but he could tell that I wasn’t being honest. I tried one more time after that—and it was an even bigger disaster.

  That’s why this is a complete waste of time. I’m never putting another guy—or myself—through that again.

  Dillon

  Earlier that day

  “Alright man, time to stop spending every Friday night on my couch. We’re going out tonight.” My best friend, Jonah, walked into the room and sat down across from me.

  “I’m a good man.” I shook my head back and forth. “I’m just going to have a few beers and chill. We’re on duty tomorrow anyway.”

  “That doesn’t mean we can’t have fun. It’s been six months since you got your head fucked up by what’s-her-face. You need to get your dick wet.” Jonah held up two envelopes. “I got us tickets to go speed dating.”

  “Fuck that.” I held up my hand. “It isn’t that I can’t find a date, it’s that I don’t want to.”

  “You’re going with me.” He stood and tossed the invitation on the table in front of me. “It’s a baby step. Maybe after a few of them, you’ll remember how to walk again.”

  I could have put my foot down and told Jonah that I didn’t want to go with him to the speed dating event, but he was going to keep annoying me if I did. I finally agreed to go, but I sure as fuck didn’t plan to have a good time. What’s-her-face had a name. It was Sarah. She was the woman I planned to spend the rest of my life with. I thought she felt the same way until she broke down one night and told me that she wasn’t ready to get married, despite accepting my proposal a few months earlier. She liked it when I was wild and crazy—when we were in our early twenties burning both ends of the night. Seeing twenty-five on the horizon scared her because she felt like there was so much, she had miss
ed out on. Apparently, one thing she missed out on was the cock carousel, but she hopped on it as soon as she gave me her engagement ring back.

  “Where do I get a drink?” I walked into the restaurant where the speed dating event was held and started looking around. “Ah, there’s the bar.”

  “It’s bottomless eggnog.” Jonah nodded quickly. “To keep us in the Christmas spirit.”

  “I guess that’s what I’m drinking then—if it’s free.” I started walking towards the bar as Jonah headed into the room where the other guys were assembled.

  A few of the women were already at their tables, some were at the bar, and I just had to make it through the entire night without leading any of them on. They were looking for love or at least a date, and I just wanted to go home. Jonah had my best interests in mind, but he couldn’t fix me because I didn’t want to be fixed. I wanted to mope, drown my sorrows, and let the anguish consume me until I was ready to figure out what the future held. Losing Sarah wasn’t easy, and the love I had for her when we're together hadn’t quite figured out how to let go of my heart. Time would heal the wound, but that clock ticked slow. I didn’t have any hope of getting back together with her—that ship sailed the second she crawled into bed with a stranger. That was her choice, but it didn’t have to be mine.

  “Check out those two girls at the bar.” Jonah motioned when I walked up to him with my eggnog in hand.

  “Which ones?” I took a quick glance over my shoulder.

  “The blonde that looks excited and the brunette that looks like she’d like to be anywhere but here.” He grinned and nodded. “They’re hot.”

  “The brunette is my spirit animal,” I grunted and shrugged. “She looks as bored as I’m about to be.”